I binged

Another failure. I now long for the days when I could get at least a week or two of abstinence under my belt before relapsing. Now it's two days. And I'm vomitting more often, even at work. I just did it. I want to write that I'm scared, but I don't feel it. I feel nothing inside me right now, just complete numbness. I like the feeling way more than I wish I did. I just spoke with my doctor...I'm going to a rehab center for a little while. I have no fight left in me, I need someone to take me by the hand and see me through this because I am killing myself trying to do it on my own. I've failed.